today is one in which I wish I could legally vent about my job in every little minute detail. But that would mean saying some negative things and it's actually against policy. Let's just say that I haven't been this pissed off in a very long time...and it had nothing to do with customers today. In lieu of venting about work, here's some stuff that's been on my mind.
so, I have this friend on facebook who is a retired older guy. I have gotten so sick of reading his posts lately. He has three children, two of which live in different states. He also has three grandchildren who are in different states as well. He just recently became a great-grandfather. Since I know that he will never read this blog, I can say that this is my grandfather I'm talking about. I haven't seen him since I was 15. I am now 28. That was the last time my mother, brother, and sister saw him as well. He joins the bandwagon and wishes me happy birthday along with the rest of my facebook friends, but that's about all I hear from him. Not that it really matters, but he never said anything when I had my daughter. No congratulations or anything. The only thing he has said to me about being a great-grandfather is, "wow, Anna, you're making me feel old." Gee, thanks! I mean, I shouldn't be surprised...he's been pretty uninvolved my whole life. About a week after my daughter was born, his wife, who I have yet to meet, contacted my mother to see what I needed for my new baby. Mom told her that gift cards would be nice since we had received most of what we needed. I have yet to see a gift. Again, it's not that I really care about getting gifts, but why ask?
Anyway, what's got me going recently is all his posts about going and visiting his brother all the time. And going away for golf tournaments, and traveling here and there. But he doesn't make any time to go see his kids. Or his grandkids. He just said a couple days ago how glad he was to be retired so he could do all the traveling he wants. Clearly visiting us is not some traveling he wants to do. I guess I shouldn't be too upset that he's not involved.
I've been really tempted to just delete most people from facebook lately. I get tired of seeing all these people take things for granted, like time, money, and love.
I guess I'm just feeling lonely lately. I am looking for connection to people and all I can come up with is facebook. It's really sad. I don't have any friends here. I have my daughter and my grandma. Sometimes I have my boyfriend. We never see each other.
Recently I lost my cousin. He was only 43. Much too young to die. It's got me thinking. You never know when those you love will be gone. Age doesn't mean anything. I need to make it my mission to visit with my family. So many of my family members are sick or have health complications. A couple of them I have had a rough time with in the last few years. I may disagree with their opinions of me, but I will never not love them.
All this rambling has got me feeling a little better. I still am feeling nostalgic. Now I'm really rambling so I'll end here.
